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Vacances en France

Seven hundred miles we travelled,
across both land and sea
because our friends had told us
France was lovely as could be.

Two caravans we towed there,
to a villa called ‘la Ronce’,
They’d been there so many times,
but us, well just this once.

We arrived a little weary,
they’d a puncture on the way.
A tyre blew off their caravan
and ripped the side away.

We stopped and then a gendarme
called a man to change the wheel.
Like something from a storybook
the scene was quite unreal.

We finally reached the campsite
and drove in through the gate
to begin our three week holiday,
we thought, now this is great.

They put us on two pitches
that were near a mile apart
and placed us both in sinking sand,
I threatened to depart.

They realised I meant it,
so they gave us two good sites
where we were pitched together
and could gossip through the nights.

We spent our days by swimming
on the glorious Français coast,
by evening we were drinking wine,
to cool our daily ‘roast’.

We took along our teenage kids,
with us they did not stay
but spent their days, with friends in bars
and made us parents pay.

The lifestyle there so different
from the one we had at home,
A slower pace of living
and not pestered by the phone.

We thought we were in heaven
as we sweltered every day,
while watching nudists on the beach
where we would swim and play.

But there was ‘one little drawback’,
just a tiny one, you see,
the site had other visitors
that drank much more than me.

These nasty little creatures
had a taste for human blood
and feasted on our bodies,
like nought but vampires should.

Swollen up from head to toe
and even on our bum,
we looked like we’d been rolled in thorns,
then toasted by the sun.

Amongst our cherished memories
when we finally left our sites,
we took home thoughts of sunny days,
while scratching insect bites!

Ivor G Davies

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